[The Protagonist Makes You Retreat About Thirty Miles] Chapter 18 – Please Show Your System Some Love And Concern

Originally posted on RBKTR Translations.
Author: The One Who Tells Stories Under the Bridge (天桥底下说书的).
Translated by: Yujuan

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On the topic of love, Ji Mo had already made a careful survey of it the moment he received his first submission fee. He was someone who aspired to make a living on writing books, but when he calculated the dating costs, the presents he would have to prepare on every festivity and a house he’d have to purchase upon marriage, the lack of a few zeros in his savings told him: At the present moment, dating someone would prevent him from living.

He had always had the personality of a realist, and so it stood to reason that the only female contact number he had belonged to his own mom. There were even moments when he thought that perhaps he’d have to spend the rest of his life alone. Who knew that in the span of three years, he would enter a new stage of life— dating a non-human in order to survive.

The gates to a whole new world had opened at such a fanciful place, he never would have thought such a development would occur.

As he walked side by side with Ye Mingjun along the streets of the Godly Continent, the passing divine attendants who saluted them pulled Ji Mo back to reality. There was no lack of couples on the streets, but these were all couples of differing sex walking hand in hand; two guys walking together like this was much too strange. Ji Mo was not so idle as to pay attention to someone else’s sexual preference, but how were two men supposed to find the feeling of love?

A kabedon? Not happening. He would definitely be unable to restrain himself from kicking Ye Mingjun away from him.

Forcefully kissing him like an overbearing CEO? He wasn’t sick in the head, why would he do such a thing that would humiliate his own body and mind?

Have a relaxed discussion on the philosophies of life? What a joke, the only outcome of discussing life lessons with Ye Mingjun would be to make him doubt his own life.

This wouldn’t do. No matter which romantic convention it was, he would turn unreasonable the moment he brought his emotions into it. Why couldn’t they become melon-eating buddies^[1] and stick to being single dogs instead?

With both his practical experience and theoretical basis equalling to zero, just as Ji Mo was having a hard time contemplating the complexities of cutsleevery, the chief culprit, Ye Mingjun, observed the people on the streets with great interest. He suddenly halted, “Why is there such a long queue over there?”

Following his line of sight, he spotted an almost never-ending line a short distance away. Sweeping a gaze through the queue, something dawned upon Ji Mo, and he spoke blandly, “The Shrine’s low-level priests come to the streets each day to provide free healing spells for the masses in order to hone their skills.”

A divine spell had a strong therapeutic effect on physical injuries, to the point that a high-level priest could even regenerate a person’s amputated limbs, but nothing could be done about the illnesses of the bones and internal organs. Logically speaking, there shouldn’t be that many injured people in the cities surrounding the Shrine. The sole reason why there was such a long queue was that these common folk had too much faith in God— they were unwilling to trust a physician no matter how accurate their diagnosis was, and only set their minds at ease once they were treated by a priest. No one knew who Su Ge’s god was, but they treated everything related to him as the truth. What a joke.

Ji Mo had seen too much the likes of these people, and had tried dissuading them at the beginning, but no longer bothered with them once he realized they were just doing anything they could to be enlightened by god’s radiance. Just when he was about to pull Ye Mingjun away from here, a married woman suddenly knelt on the path before him, her forehead almost touching the tips of his feet,

“Morning Star Priest, my child is sick, could you please give him your blessings?”

Wuyan zoomed into the details surrounding the woman’s body, and when Ji Mo swept across her ragged clothes, he said quietly, “Xianjun, please cast your invisibility spell.”

Ye Mingjun did not refuse his request, merely lifting a hand to make them both vanish in the eyes of others. As he observed the instant look of defeat on the woman’s face, Ji Mo lifted his head to glance at Ye Mingjun next to him, “Aren’t you going to ask me why I’m not helping her?”

“That’s just typhoid fever, he’ll get better once he takes his medication on time.”

Ye Mingjun had been researching strange and novel things in the past five thousand years. Naturally, the art of healing was among them, and he had seen the truth with just a look.

Ji Mo wasn’t exactly surprised by his cheat, and said flatly, “Those were medicine stains on her sleeve. She ought to have seen a physician beforehand, but still wished to receive treatment from a divine spell although she was well aware it was just a minor illness. It was exactly because she knew that she wouldn’t be able to get in line that she pleaded for a White Robed Priest’s blessing, at the risk of offending me.”

The immortal could not comprehend such a meaningless action. At last, he asked in puzzlement, “Is this the love a mother holds for her child?”

“Yes, a mighty yet foolish love. A priest’s daily mana is limited, and if she took another’s right to be healed, this would surely delay the treatment of a patient who genuinely needs to be cured. However, she will not consider this, as a cough from her child is far more important than a stranger’s life.”

Looking on as the married woman continued watching stealthily along the shadows, as if waiting for a chance to cut in line, a trace of a helpless yet sardonic smile flashed across his face, “Does Xianjun still consider love as something good?”

Humans were truly a complicated species; Ye Mingjun had always been unable to comprehend what was filling up their tiny minds. For instance, Ji Mo was smiling at this very moment, but all he could sense from him was the feeling of melancholy.

However, he still persisted in his views, and said, “I think what’s sad about it isn’t love, but ignorance.”

“Those who are ignorant, are easier to control.”

The immortal’s insight, cultivated for thousands of years, was enough to see the truth. Ji Mo knew that he was merely correct in his words, but his voice became increasingly downcast,

“Chang Hui has coddled this generation of the Godly Continent’s people to the point where they can’t do anything other than rely on the Shrine – even matters such as ploughing the fields or enacting marriages has to go through the Shrine before proceeding smoothly. This isn’t the world that Su Ge wants, but he can’t bring himself to ruin the people who have faith in him, which is why he ended up being constrained for thirty years. I presume that his decision to merge with the Demonic Continent has to do with the fact that he understands he will be no match for Ye Junhou in a couple of years, and has finally chosen to burn the bridge and destroy this faith with his own hands.”

Before the Celestials’ arrival, this piece of land was originally ruled by the Fei Kingdom. Later on, Ye Junhou had struck, and Su Ge joined hands with Chang Hui to oppose him, both sides dividing Fei territory into two which had become the present day Godly and Demonic continents. The kingdom with the largest territory had been so vulnerable in the presence of the Celestials that only thirty years had passed before the Feians had practically forgotten how they had once flourished, completely submitting under the rule of Celestials.

Regardless of which world he was in, Su Ge was still that High Priest who wished to save the world, and he believed that the destruction of local civilization due to outside forces was a sad thing to see. The reason why he chose to merge with the Demonic Continent was purely just to make the Fei Kingdom return to its previous state. Perhaps, even without Chang Hui’s departure, these two were bound to walk down diverging paths, because they weren’t truly like-minded from the start.

Ji Mo had long since noticed the problems with the Shrine, but as someone who had only been in the Shrine for three years and was constantly being guarded against by Chang Hui, he did not have the ability to change the way things ran here. The same applied for this situation – he did not talk about those worldly disputes, instead saying to Ye Mingjun with a soft sigh, “So, Ye Mingjun, even if you like me, please do not unconditionally fulfill all my needs, do not let me become too dependent on you. To us humans, completely losing our sense of self is something very pitiable.”

Ji Mo had always been very clear of the fact that Ye Mingjun’s feelings for him were much closer to how one would feel towards a pet than a lover. He would keep him by his side out of pity and interest, and wouldn’t mind using various toys to keep him happy, but with regards to his sincerity, there was probably a limit. The humans had raised other species as playthings, and so it wasn’t really unexpected to end up with the same fate now that they had encountered a much higher being. At least, compared to humans, Ye Mingjun’s temperament was much too gentle.

“Of course, I am not a person who will give up on living for my own moral integrity, so I will definitely ask you for help if I encounter any dangerous situations. As long as you are willing to respond, I will do the best of my ability to repay you.”

Being confined would make a person lose their survivability, and even if they were set free after their master had grown bored of them, they would still be unable to return to their normal lives. Ji Mo was being forced to the immortal’s side by life’s fetters; the world was too dangerous, and all he could do was do his best not to turn docile. The fate of a pet who was not obedient enough and dared to yearn for freedom only hinged on the master’s temperament.

Just like a phrase he had written into his own novel— If you are unable to stand in defiance, pray that you will meet someone good.

Luckily, Ye Mingjun was a truly affable and kind immortal. Hearing his words, he merely gave his usual soft smile, “Then, as a reward for granting your request, can you hug me?”

Alright then, this Xianjun’s learning capacity is a little too strong, does he like patting humans that much?

Looking helplessly at him, Ji Mo attempted to struggle, “Xianjun, a hug without any emotion isn’t worth much value.”

“I still don’t quite understand the humans’ perception, but at least to me, liking something means that it’s worth it.”

Fine, since you’ve said it, I’ll let you pat me. In any case, the most interesting part about hugs are the blushing faces and thumping hearts, you’ll know that there’s no meaning to it when I let you have your way with an expressionless face. You’ll pat me, and I’ll take the chance to pat you. In terms of rarity, I won’t be the one suffering losses.

Seeing that this guy had made up his mind, Ji Mo silently comforted himself, thinking that they were both under the invisible spell anyhow, and simply wrapped his arms around the immortal’s waist.

Ye Mingjun’s body temperature was as cool as jade, and perhaps because they had just returned from the lakeside, a moist breath of greenery exuded faintly from his robes. This was Ji Mo’s first time taking the initiative to come so close to someone else, and while he had already convinced himself to stay unconcerned, that he was merely hugging a large night luminous pearl^[2], his heart couldn’t help but skip a beat.

Ye Mingjun was actually pretty easy to deal with; he wouldn’t continue his badgering as long as you fulfilled his requests. Right now, he did not make any additional movements either, as if his curiosity had been suddenly piqued and just wanted to experience the novelty of being approached by Ji Mo.

With such a simple nature, put in a novel, he would definitely be mercilessly torn to dregs… No, in the case of that disgusting storyline from Monarch’s Descent Into The Wastelands, he had indeed been thoroughly used by the female leads.

The plot of that legendary BE novel surfacing at the bottom of his heart, Ji Mo felt that this was a true prelude to Ye Mingjun’s future, so he lifted his head to advise him, “Xianjun, humans are not as simple-minded as animals. Human nature will always be insatiable, we will only care about things we cannot have. If you wish to have your feelings be cherished, do not let others obtain it easily.”

So, as the one who constantly worries about me being used by others, do you really not have the slightest feelings for me?

Hearing him say that, a trace of playfulness flashed across Ye Mingjun’s eyes. He pinched this human’s fair and clear cheeks, and finally let out a chuckle, “Are you sure? This way you’ll have to pay a higher price when you ask me for help.”

Uh, that seemed to be the case. He had forgotten once again that he was the female lead about to tear this guy to dregs. There was no helping it, he really couldn’t immerse himself into this role…

Sigh, just what was this? Digging a hole by the road, then telling the one passing through that there was a hole up ahead, f*ck, this must be true love!

He was filled by admiration by his own miraculous stunt. Ji Mo forcefully kept his cool as he separated himself from the immortal’s embrace, staunchly refusing to reveal a single trace of the sheepishness in his heart, “Xianjun, ignore what I just said.”

Ji Mo was incredibly used to preserving the deadly calm facade on his exterior, and there really wasn’t any sign of the roaring waves running through his heart at present. Yet, at the sight of him, Ye Mingjun happily pressed him back into his chest instead, “You’re so cute!”

Not expecting him to make such a sudden action, Ji Mo was instantly a little dumbstruck. It was fortunate that the Diorama of Civilization that had been forgotten by a certain Xianjun at the bottom of the lake rushed in at this critical moment, faithfully carrying out its duty, “Xianjun, you hugged your capture target without permission, please accept punishment.”

“You couldn’t have come back at a worse time.”

Following Ye Mingjun’s look of displeasure, a scarlet flame fell onto the picture scroll. Unfortunately, the System’s creator seemed to have anticipated this, and chose to fit it into the Diorama of Civilization, another ancient artifact, which was why it was still able to let out an unflinching cry of righteousness, “Xianjun, please do not attack the System with True Samadhi Fire.”

And so Ye Mingjun, whose attempts at eliminating the referee and getting off the hook had turned out to be unsuccessful, said solemnly to Ji Mo, “Let’s seriously complete our mission to unlock the seal.”

Which is why you shouldn’t have sealed off your cultivation from the start!

Side-eyeing this Xianjun, who would even dig himself a pit when he became mischievous, there was only a resolute thought left in Ji Mo’s mind. From this day onward, he would pledge his life to protect the System!

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Ji Mo: Say, why did a straight man like me end up attracting another man?

Ye Mingjun: But this just proves the fact that you’ve never been attracted by another girl in the first twenty or so years of your life.

Ji Mo: Impossible, my sexuality could even hold up against Brilliant Moon’s good looks!

Ye Mingjun: The books say that two shous don’t match well together.

Ji Mo: Do me a favor and close that green app^[3] on your screen, thanks.

Author’s Note: One more chapter left before we reach the battlegrounds for the Demonic Continent dungeon

TL Notes

[1] ‘Melon-eating buddies’ – 吃瓜 refers to a crowd of passive onlookers who are usually listening to gossip.

[2] ‘night luminous pearl’ – Also known as 夜明珠 (yèmíngzhū), a pearl that shines in the dark (where Ye Mingjun’s name/title probably comes from). This is what the biggest night luminous pearl looks like:

[3] ‘Green app/website’ – Refers to JJWXC, home to plenty of BL novels

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